Mr. Barnes & Mr. Bigglesworth

[6.17.09] From: Harry Barnes
Date: June 17, 2009 7:04:30 AM CDT
Subject: PERSONAL
Reply-To: harrymanbarnes@yahoo.com.hk

Dear Friend,

With a very desperate need for assistance,I have summed up courage to contact you.I am presently in Iraq with the USA marine platoon;I found your contact particulars in an Address journal.I am seeking your assistance to evacuate the sum of $12.7m USD (Twelve Million Seven hundred Thousand United States Dollars)to you,as far as I can be assured that it will be safe in your care until I complete my service here.
This is no stolen money,and there are no dangers involved.

SOURCE OF MONEY:
Some money in various currencies was discovered concealed in barrels with piles of weapons and ammunition at a location near one of Saddam's old palaces during a rescue operation,and it was agreed by all party present that the money be shared amongst us,this was quite an illegal thing to do, but I tell you what? No compensation can make up for the risks we have taken with our lives in this hell hole.

The above figure was given to me as my share,and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me,so with the help of a German contact working here,and his office enjoys some immunity,I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of trouble spot.He does not know the real contents of the package,and believes that it belongs to an Asian American who died in an air raid,and before giving up,trusted me to hand over the package to his family.There is a secured way of getting the package out to a safer country for you to pick up,and i will discuss this with you when I am sure that you are willing to assist me.

One passionate appeal I will make to you is not to discuss this matter with a third party,should you have reasons to reject this offer.please destroy this mail as any leakage of this information will be too bad for us.

I do not know for how long we will remain here but hopefully before the year runs out,I have survived 2 suicide bomb attacks by the special grace of God,this and other reasons I will mention later has prompted me to reach out for help.

Please you can reach me on my personal e-mail address below for more information s.

Email: harrymanbarnes@yahoo.com.hk

Respectfully,

Harry Barnes.

*****
[6.26.09] My dear Mr. Barnes,

I applaud your discretion; it was a good choice to hijack the money you found and hand it over to a clueless German who--poor schmuck--believes it to be from a slain Asian-American hero. Well done!

In my excitement I confess I did leak this information to my cockatoo, Mr. Bigglesworth. You don't mind, do you? He understands the sensitivity of this information; we had a serious conversation about it, and be assured, Mr. Bigglesworth isn't talking.

Well, let's get down to business. I am eager to help you, especially given the hell hole you are in. One question, though. When you say you "survived 2 suicide bomb attacks by the special grace of God", do you mean that, by God's grace, you survived 2 suicide bomb attacks? Or do you mean that the bomb attacks were initiated by the grace of God? If the latter, this is most alarming. I hope God is not out to get you.

Looking forward to working with you.

Ms. Kitty

*****

[6.26.09] Dear Kitty,

Thank you for responding and your willingness to help me, I will sure explain the details and your prospective role, before I proceed, I will require some assurances from you that you will not use any information that I will share with you against me in anyway, and also assure me that you will preserve my share in your care and release same to me without any problems when I complete my mission here.

I will also like to know how much of you will like to keep as your share for your prospective role in this. As soon as I have a mail fro m you addressing the above issues, I will proceed with the details.

You may be wondering why I choose to trust a delicate matter like this in the care of a stranger, but this is the best I can do in my present situation.I would have trusted this kind of project in the hands of my wife who was my closest confidant, but I lost her to cancer on 22ND April 2006, 7 months after we were married, and my only brother has ruined his life with hard drugs, hence my decision to work with a neutral person if we can establish some trust between ourselves instead of confiding in my buddies back homes so that this little secret can be preserved.

I will await your response to proceed...

Respectfully,
Capt. Harry Barnes

*****

[6.29.09] Harry,

Thanks for writing back.

I read what you said about your decision to interact with a neutral person and I understand. There are several things that will establish trust between us.

1. CODE NAMES. Please use the code name "Captain Crunch"; that way I know I am speaking to you and no one else. I will be known as "Miss Kitty."

2. PASS PHRASE. At the beginning of every email you must ask me this question: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" And I will know that I am speaking with you. I shall explain why the chicken did what she did, and you will know that it is me.

If you want to send a photo of yourself or the money that would help as well. Rest assured no one knows about our conversations nor our plan except Mr. Bigglesworth, my trustworthy cockatoo. I'm sure you don't mind.

As to how much of the money I keep, that is up to you. Does 25% sound fair?

Miss Kitty

*****

[6.29.09]Dear Kitty,

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Thank you for at least giving me an opportunity to explain myself, please do not hesitate to ask for clarification whenever there is need as I proceed, I want to assure you that there a very secure way of getting the packages (money) out of here, I will sure explain the details and your prospective role.

Due to time constraints, I will go ahead to tell you how the funds will be evacuated from here.:

DETAILS:
The UN shuttle plane departs Baghdad international airport once in a week to 2 European countries,(Madrid, Spain and London, UK) the passengers and all the luggage's on such flights enjoy absolute immunity from the normal checks at these 2 ports, I have made very solid and confirmed arrangements to move the packages via one of such flights after we have discussed properly, explored all details and agree in principle to proceed, I will be assisted to carry out this task by a female contact, who is working with the protocol unit of the UN operations here in Iraq,and is quite close to me, even though she does not, and must not know that the packages contains money for personal reasons, The packages on arrival in Europe will be moved to th e UN liaison office in London or Spain depending on our choice.

Your Role:
To Take Over the Project as soon as the packages arrive Europe. if you choose the above option, you will have to travel to London or Spain, to take delivery of the packages, and I will explain to you how you will be guided or assisted to have the packages released to you.

2ND OPTION:
THERE IS A SECOND OPTION THAT YOU DO NOT HAVE TRAVEL, THIS OPTION WILL REQUIRE CONTRACTING THE SERVICES OF A DELIVERY AGENCY, WHO ARE ALSO CONSULTANTS TO UN OPERATIONS IN EUROPE, TO HAVE THE PACKAGES DELIVERED TO YOU IN ANY PART OF THE WORLD, I WILL WRITE MORE ON THIS IF YOU ARE NOT SATISFIED WITH THE FIRST OPTION THAT REQUIRES TRAVELING. THE SAME AGENCY HAD CARRIED OUT A SIMILAR TASK FOR 2 OF MY COLLEAGUES WHO HAD A SHARE IN THIS, ONE WAS DELIVERED IN YEMEN, WHILE THE OTHER WAS DELIVERED IN SULPHUR SPRINGS, TEXAS.

As it is now, I do not have a choice than to accept the percentage that will please you so that we can all have a free mind. I have agreed that you take 30%, and we set aside 10% for expenses, while I have 60%. but you must make sure that my own share is intact in your care as agreed. I may have need for most of my share to be disbursed into some investment, but we have to agree between both of us, the type of investment that will be. We will discuss that later.So you have 30% of the proceeds.

This is not the type of project you drag for too long, and I am under pressure to get the packages out of here, I do not have so much time on my hands, I want you to be more committed to this, I will like you to take this more serious if you want to help, then we can proceed. let me also be sure that you sincerely want to work with me.

I will like you to examine both options, and get back to me with your comments and position, then I will proceed with comparing both options.

Respectfully,
"Captain Crunch"

*****

[7.8.09] Cap'n Crunch,

The chicken crossed the road to escape the wrath of Colonel Sanders.

After careful consideration, I choose to travel as you offered in Option 1. London sounds like the best option, in fact I've already been invited to play cricket with the Queen. Will you be joining us for tea?

Like you, I do not wish to drag this project out too long. 30% for myself is quite agreeable, and I thank you for your generosity. I have to warn you, though, Mr. Bigglesworth is asking for his share--are you willing to pay him 5%? Either that or he requests a lifetime supply of crackers; he is coming with me to London so please do not try to cheat him out of his cut.

Please include a photograph of yourself so that I know I am dealing with a genuine person. I would like you to be doing something unique in the photo, like making a funny face or a thumbs up sign. That way I know it is not a fake person. Please do not be offended by my skepticism, but you do realize that we are handling a large sum of money and trust is utmost important.

Yours,
Ms. Kitty